Even My Sins?

"For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need." -Hebrews 4:15-16

Sometimes I wonder about life, actually I wonder a lot. It is easy for me to dwell on my own mistakes and the mistakes that I keep on repeating. When I get caught up in this dwelling on the past I have a hard time believing that even my sins are covered in Christ's atonement. I forget myself and show a weakness of faith allowing myself to be caught in Satan's trap of feeling hopeless. Today I read this scripture and I was reminded that I do know, down to my core, that Christ suffered and bled from every pore for me! Christ went through all my mistakes he experienced all my pain so that I, in my imperfection, could actually have a chance in this life. I am truly grateful for that.

Thank You

"I say unto you, my brethren, that if you should render all the thanks and praise which your whole soul has power to possess, to that God who has created you, and has kept and preserved you, and has caused that ye should rejoice, and has granted that ye should live in peace one with another-- I say unto you that if ye should serve him who has created you from the beginning, and is preserving you from day to day, by lending you breath, that ye may live and move and do according to your own will, and even supporting you from one moment to another--I say, if ye should serve him with all your whole souls yet ye would be unprofitable servants. And behold, all that he requires of you is to keep his commandments; and he has promised you that if ye would keep his commandments he should prosper in the land; and he never doth vary from that which he hath said; therefore, if ye do keep his commandments he doth bless you and prosper you. and now, in the first place, he has created you, and granted unto you your lives, for which ye are indebted unto him. And secondly, he doth require that ye should do as he hath commanded you; for which if ye do, he doth immediately bless you; and therefore he hat paid you. And ye are still indebted unto him, and are, and will be, forever and ever; therefore, of what have ye to boast?" -Mosiah 2:20-24

My debts to Heavenly Father are so great. I cannot even begin to understand what has been sacrificed for me. and so on this day of thanks-giving I want to thank Him. I am such an unworthy vessel, so imperfect and yet He never seems to give up on me. How do you repay something like that? I think that is king Benjamin's point... you can't repay that. All you can ever hope to do is be a little bit more grateful for the love and the gift. God has given me everything I can say matters at all. Without Him nothing. So I pledge that in the coming months I will remember what was sacrificed and try to show by my actions and words my true gratitude for it all.

The Strength to Go On

Life has been though for me. I don't want to sound like I am complaining, but I have had some very hard struggles in my life. There are things that I have been through that I wouldn't have made it through without the support of loving friends and in the end without the loving arms of the Savior wrapped tightly around me. I am reminded of a quote given to me by my friend Heather Harris Lyons. "Friends are like the pillars on your front porch. sometimes they bear you up and sometimes it is just enough to know that they are standing by if you need them." What would I do without friends. My life would never have been found were it not for friendship. I would have almost nothing good without friends. Without the friendship of Christ my life really would be nothing.

"yeah I know that I am nothing; as to my strength I am weak; but I will boast of my God, for in his strength I can do all things; yea, behold, many mighty miracles we have wrought in this land, for which we will praise his name forever." -Alma 26:12

"And again I say unto you, my friends, for from henceforth I shall call you friends, it is expedient that I give unto you this commandment, that ye become even as my friends in days when I was with them, traveling to preach the gospel in my power;" 

-D & C 84:77

Begin Now

"...In life no road can be re-traveled just as once it was. We can't begin where we were. But we can begin where we are, and in an eternity of existence, this is a reassuring fact. There is virtually nothing that a man cannot turn away from if he really wants to.... there is virtually no habit that he cannot give up if he sincerely sets his will to do so."

-Elder Richard L. Evans

I have had my share of roads traveled in life. There are a few I wish I could do over again, but that isn't possible. What I must do is go down the roads that lie before me and hope that I make some better choices in the roads that I travel down. Life is surprisingly like a backpacking trip. You start out on a trail sometimes it goes up sometimes down. At times you can see where you are going and at times not. some parts of the path are strait and others wind. For me life is the same. It is challenging and interesting and you can never re-travel the same path because there is always something new. so begin to live life today. If you have things you need to change then change them. Act now because you never know what tomorrow will bring your way.

Unthoughtful

"Behold, you have not understood; you have supposed that I would give it unto you, when you took no thought save it was to ask me."

Doctrine and Covenants 9:7

Apparently I have been a very unthoughtful person as of late. As I pondered this passage I have realized that lately my life has been full of a lot of asking and not a lot of acting. Heavenly Father wants me to think before I ask and then to roll up my sleeves and get to work. How desperately I need to learn the principle of action. Life demands more than just an idle hope or a thoughtless prayer. What is required is good hard work. If I am to become what I know I have the potential to be I will have to work hard and not let my days be wasted in idle pursuits. So now the trick is to take my time and be a more thoughtful person and a more active responder to my own prayers and my own needs.

To Truly Hear

"Yea, behold, I will tell you in your mind and in your heart, by the Holy Ghost, which shall come upon you and which shall dwell in your heart."

Doctrine and Covenants 8:2

How I long to feel the constant and consistent influence of the Holy Ghost in my life. It is not easy in this crazy wild world we live in to be tuned into that still small voice all the time. I know I fail daily to listen as closely as I ought to. I am left wondering how will I get to the place I need to be if I am not able to be in tune with that guiding voice? I have concluded that I need to learn to listen. I think in life one of the most important and most commonly overlooked skills is that of listening. How often do we take the time to really listen to what the people around us are really saying? How often do we lend our ears without casting judgement, or giving our two bits worth? I think that if we have such trouble listening to the people we love who are here with us then we will have big problems learning to listen to that still voice of the Spirit. I have worked a lot on trying to listen more to those around me and to the Spirit since my mission. As I take a survey of my life it is clear to me that I have a whole lot of work to do on my listening skills. I think it may take a lifetime to perfect the art of listening but I am sure that as I make real efforts at listening more to others and to the Spirit I will have a more full life that will bless and touch others in a much better way. So now the work and learning to listen not only with the ears but also with the heart.

Peace Be The Journey!

For those of you who don't know "Peace be the journey" is a quote from the movie Cool Runnings. It came to mean a lot to me on my mission. At particularly hard time on my mission my little sister sent me a letter that had that quote written on it and I adopted it as my motto. Here is what "Peace be the journey" means to me. Life is crazy and if you haven't figured that out yet you are going to soon. Life seems to rage about with trials stacked upon trials. We cannot control life no matter how hard we try what we can control is ourselves. So to me "Peace be the journey" is not peace in the world around us but it is peace inside us. That inner peace cannot be taken by anyone unless we let them take it. We are in control of that peace. I need peace in this world and the inner peace may be the only way I can really find it. I hope that all of us can find a way for peace to be our journey. 

"Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid."

John 14:27